So I had my date with The Scientist, hands down the best. Date. Ever!
I’m not going to go in to all the details but it was over the whole weekend and involved pickles, horror movies, kisses, snuggles, sex, kisses, the beach, a power station, kisses, Essex, more kissing and fire works.
In a previous blog post I said nice guys finish last, I was wrong. For the first time ever I went on a date with someone who was so genuinely sweet and nice and he was hotter and sexier than any bad boy ever.
Before I start this post I best point out that it’s not about the time I went down on a sailor….
‘Submarining’ is another one of these dating terms that have popped up recently like catfishing and breadcrumbing. It means when someone disappears with out explanation and reappears with out one.
This has happened to me with one individual over the years of doing this…Mr Hot but Dull. I’ve been guilty of replying to him in the past mainly trying to get him to explain what the fuck he’s playing at. He always says he thinks of me and then texts…no mate you get pissed and start hitting up randoms in your phone book more like! I can’t even remember how long we spoke for initially? Maybe a few weeks. But he was so dull I let him go. Since then he must have messaged me probably four or five times for a few days and then disappeared. I always made it clear that nothing would happen so what was he getting out of it? We never had enough in common to be friends, and you know, I like to meet up with my friends not just sporadically text them. I always replied because I thought he was lonely and I’m a sucker for the underdog. The last time this happened though I just realised that it was bollocks and I’m not the RSPCA- it’s not up to me to be nice to waifs and strays!
Have I been guilty of submarining in the past? God no! If someone doesn’t do it for me anymore I’m not going to slide back into their DMs just because I’m bored or horny, which I guess this is the whole reason this has become a thing. Seriously peeps have you never heard of Netflix or porn?
Next time you think of doing this guys. Don’t. Theres only one time us ladies like a men going down, popping up and going down again.
So I have a date on Friday with The Scientist. He’s cute and funny and is just nice. The spark isn’t 100% there for me yet but after my last blog post I’m going to give him a chance. I do like him but I have a feeling I’m probably going to be a bit much.
The funniest thing is, is that his dad is a vicar. Can you imagine this going well and me being introduced to a vicar?! I have the worst potty mouth ever! I don’t even deliberately do it, it just slips out. The scientist rarely swears as it is so I have to bite my tongue a lot. But I can see me accidentally saying the worst possible thing.
He does seem super innocent as well so I hope I can corrupt him…I mean open him up a little bit. I think this is why I like him. He’s the opposite to any one I’ve recently spoken to. He’s kind and caring….any way I ll keep you updated!
I read this statement recently that said ‘I love men but I love my sanity more’ and that really resonated with me.
My craziness comes when I actually like someone, my head fucks itself over and issues with self worth and self doubt creep in. Other than the last month this year has been fine as I’ve not let myself get attached, so I guess the solution is carry on doing the casual thing forever? 😦 I guess that works right now as I’m not talking to anyone and the ones I have spoken to I don’t feel enough connection with to take things further.
I’m fully aware it’s also just three and a teeny bit months before xmas and I’m still single so can we all ignore those blogs where I said this was going to be my year and I would fall in love….cringe!
So I'm back to having multiple fun sexy conversations and it's been good for me, even if the deeper connection isn't there yet it's still nice not to be burdened by other people's issues.
I haven't heard from Mr A, I guess it goes to show who he is that he can't even apologise for the last really shitty week. I'm still a little wounded by the fact he wasn't who he made out he was but that's online dating for you, people lie to get what they want.
Anyway, I do have a date planned for the weekend….if we manage to pull this (not him….yet!) off then it will be a very long time coming…..3 years in fact! I ll keep you posted!
So Mr A exceeded all expectations in real life! He was everything that I wanted and lots more.
Date 1 was great and we didn’t even have a proper date, He came back to my house and what can I say? The sex was amazing (all 6 times!) but between all that he’s so fun to chill with. He made me feel relaxed and comfortable.
I’m not going to say to much now and be all mushy but watch this space I suppose….I’m excited too see what happens!
You ll do Mr A….you ll most certainly do.
Over the past month or so due to some major detachment and some other serious shit going down I’ve realised that there’s more to life than online dating. I barely swipe anymore, and I have no enthusiasm talking to tinderfellas.
Why is this I hear you ask? I realised I’ve already found my soulmate (on a completely non romantic friendship level of course!) actually I have two ( shout out to you mrs Jones!) But I’m going to focus on one today.
Readers of this blog know who I’m talking about so there’s no need for names, you probably also know what’s happened between us over the years and I ll never be able to explain that part because our friendship is more than that.
He gets me 100%. He knows I’m a self destructive nightmare, that I feel as though I don’t deserve him so will constantly push him away and will give him a fuck ton of shit but he accepts that, he’s not a walk over though, he frequently puts me in my place and reigns me in he’s the only man who I allow to hand me my bollocks (after a lot of arguing!).
I’ve had intense friendships with the opposite sex before (I’ve even got the tattoos to prove it!) but this is different. It feels like I have to cherish it and never take it for granted.
I have to admit our friendship does affect relationships. There’s no telling some people that were just friends. I get asked frequently why we’re not together but it’s never been about that. Our friendship is way more important. Do I compare him to other guys? In all honesty, yes. It’s hard not to! I want someone who’s always there for me like he is, who doesn’t judge me, who accepts my crazy who wants to play ridiculous games and answer silly questions and looks out for me. I also want someone who I would take a bullet for because I know (and he knows!) I would for him. He literally means the world to me and it’s taken me long enough to realise I do to him. Also his hair and fashion sense on a tinderfella would be great but now I’m just being picky!
Recently sex and dating has become so empty and boring for me. I can’t stand one dimensional sex talk anymore. It’s not fun. But you know what? it’s not important! If I’m meant to fall in love this year that will happen, it’s ok not to get a million messages a day and get thumb burn from all the swiping and you know why? I’m happy and fulfilled with the people I’ve already got in my life, my soulmates.