Day 217

So what's new with me?

The subject of kids has come up again. I think I've just got to the age now where it's to be expected. I was chatting to a guy let's call him Christopher and we were getting along nicely on tinder so I gave him my number and his profile picture was him and a kid. I asked him and he said that it was his son and he had abuse (?!) before for it so he didn't mention him….so the opinion of random Tinderellas is more important than his 'world?' his words not mine. I told him straight that he should write it on his profile and if I'm being honest after what happened with Mr A I wouldn't have swiped him. Anyway, we made it to the phone call stage and I just didn't like him. His personality wasn't for me. He also said some really offensive things that he passed off as a joke but if they were then he just wasn't funny. So I shut down that shit. A hot face will never make up for a bad personality.

I also got a random snapchat add from The Londoner to which I replied 'oh fuck no' I do not wish to see that dickhead with a dog filter thanks!

So it's clearly all love and happiness my end! Mwah!

Saturday thoughts.

One of the most annoying things ever online dating is on Tinder when you see a really hot guy as you swipe you're already imagining your life together, planning the wedding, naming the kids and what colour pug you want (or in my case what positions were going to be doing!) and yay he swipes back!….but then you start to message and he's dry AF and his spelling is all off.

The disappointment is real.

Back at it.

So I'm back to having multiple fun sexy conversations and it's been good for me, even if the deeper connection isn't there yet it's still nice not to be burdened by other people's issues.

I haven't heard from Mr A, I guess it goes to show who he is that he can't even apologise for the last really shitty week. I'm still a little wounded by the fact he wasn't who he made out he was but that's online dating for you, people lie to get what they want.

Anyway, I do have a date planned for the weekend….if we manage to pull this (not him….yet!) off then it will be a very long time coming…..3 years in fact! I ll keep you posted!

Good Morning.

So I woke up this morning and realised I was done with Mr A.

I should have actually been done when this all started going wrong but I held on to the fact things were a little different with him and that was stupid of me. Things have been a little different with lots of different people in the past so I don't know why I was blinded this time.

He's too angry and bitter. I always think how you react in bad situations shows a lot about you as a person and he's reacted awfully in this one. As I said I'm not going to tell you what's been going on as it's not my place but just because he's been treated badly does not give him the right to treat me badly back. I tried with him, I let him off thinking that it was the situation and underneath he was a nice guy but after the 75th rude and abrupt message I'm done. I can't help him, I was stupid thinking I could. He's at that stage where he's wallowing and making everything worse and fucking himself over in the process. I would be crazy to start off anything with someone like that. I need laid back and fun not someone who's ready to explode.

Looking back I should have seen this coming. Since day one he has told me about this problem and I shouldn't have ignored the way he spoke about it and honestly he shouldn't be on dating sites when he's got all this going on as he's projecting and spreading shit that people just don't need. I get everyone has their issues….read this blog I'm teeming with them but I would never let anyone who I was dating see them.

So it's back to the apps…. I feel ok about it, I've been at the beach the last couple of days so it feels like it's a fresh start.

Date #17

So Mr A exceeded all expectations in real life! He was everything that I wanted and lots more. 

Date 1 was great and we didn’t even have a proper date, He came back to my house and what can I say? The sex was amazing (all 6 times!) but between all that he’s so fun to chill with. He made me feel relaxed and comfortable. 

I’m not going to say to much now and be all mushy but watch this space I suppose….I’m excited too see what happens! 

You ll do Mr A….you ll most certainly do. 

A little update. 

#1 and definitely the most important my horn has returned! I’m not saying why or how yet but it’s back and stronger than ever! 

#2 last night I get a message from Ringo… ffs! I literally had to scroll back in this blog to remember who he was! Then I realised he was someone that I really didn’t like and had blocked. He was all ‘I feel we have a connection’ I had to tell him straight that we really didn’t. 

#3 the two guys who I’ve been speaking to are both on holiday and it couldn’t be more opposite in terms of contact whilst they have been away. I’m keeping quiet on the first guy (for now!) but the second is Mr Wright II. We’ve literally not spoken at all and is it bad I haven’t missed him? We spoke on the phone before he went away and he did seem cute and a million times better than on text (maybe it was because he couldn’t use the thumbs up emoji!) but I still don’t really feel a spark. Maybe sometimes the spark isn’t instant but I don’t know if I can be bothered to wait around and find out. 

#4 I’ve made another online dating ‘friend’. If you’ve been with this blog since the beginning you would have heard me talk about HBG, the other day we actually spoke for the first time. He’s funny and silly but we’ve been chatting for years now and I don’t fancy him and he doesn’t fancy me. We literally want completely opposite things. I want to fall in love and he wants to bang. It’s good to have another friend to talk about this online dating shit with. 

#4 something else has happened but I’m also keeping this very much on the DL as I’m processing it at the minute and working out what I want from it and if I want anything from it. 

So that’s what’s new with me, it’s weird after months and months of total meh loads of things have come at once! 

A little update. 

So I’ve cancelled both my dates this week. I had to be honest with Ringo and tell him that even though he might be amazing in real life all I had to go off was whatsapp and I didn’t like him on there. He just constantly acted like a douche! I don’t even think he realised what he was doing which made it worse. I don’t have any time for that shit. 

Wheels is another story, he’s never been a douche but the messaging has just fizzled out. I can’t be bothered to go out with someone that I don’t fancy and I’m not feeling 100% about. 

In other news I was on bumble for an hour and scored one phone number and quite a few matches. Maybe I’m not so sucky at opening messages! 

I also deleted my old tinder account and restarted it. Feels so weird to be on 20 matches and not 1000! I wasn’t talking to anyone on there so thought that a change was good and might give me an opportunity to swipe all those hotties my clumsy sausage fingers accidentally said no to! 

So that’s what’s going on with me….Onwards and upwards!