Snapchat, dating, men, women, sex, relationships, humour, funny, blog

Oh snap!

I love snapchat. I’m all about the basic bitch doggie filter and the 2015 flower crown but it really should be named ‘imnotpreparedtogiveyoumynumberbutimgonnashowyoumygenitalschat’ (we ll work on the name later!) 

Take hot ginger stranger for example, we exhanged about 2 messages he asks for my snap and straight away he hits me up with a picture of him in bed showing off his incredible bod! I’m not complaining but then he starts with ‘I wish you were here’ well I kinda do too and ‘I bet you taste amazing’ well tell me something I don’t know! I wonder how long it takes for me to see his penis? I had to bounce this morning and go to work but it’s so obviously coming…ooh i might get to see that as well! 

This has happened to me more than once on the snap and usually it’s not even a sexy convo it’s just bam here’s my dick! 

I’ve had a mortifying experience when I accidentally sent two, yes two pictures to an acquaintance who has a fiancé! I’m not a side chick so had to apologise profusely for that one. I’m guessing it’s different when they’ve sent me a filtered wank video though, hardly accidental. 

There was also the guy who saw my pof, didn’t want to message me on there so set up a snap just to talk to me. That’s a lot of graft to play a solo on your meat whistle mate! I didn’t pursue it on the account I thought it was a little bit stalkery. 

I’m not adverse to sending the odd racy picture or video. Not after two messages (maybe four if I’m super horny!) but I’d rather just whatsapp. You can make longer videos and keep pictures without them knowing you’re going to pet the poodle later…thanks snap chat for informing peeps when they’ve been screen shotted, you’re literally telling them that’s going in the wank bank! 

Anyway I’ve got to go, I’ve just finished work and I’ve got a hot ginger strangers penis to see and a rainbow to vomit!

Happy snapping! 


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