Going full Jessica Fletcher

As much as I hate to admit it Snoop Dogg himself X was right….grrr! 

If you are a reader of this blog you will know in my last post I discussed whether or not it was ok to FB stalk someone who you had just got chatting to online I don’t agree but Mrs Marple X said in this world of modern dating it needs to be done. 

So I matched…erm…. let’s call him Cunty Cunterson (you ll find out why in about a second) on Tinder, he seemed nice, a chef with tattoos and a beard and a guitar. I like the idea of a chef mainly because I have haribos for dinner most nights and a steak would be a nice change up from starmix anyhoo we swapped numbers and I noticed on whatsapp his profile picture was of him and a girl, no biggie, I have me and my male friends on there but on the second message the picture had changed to one of his tattoo….ok….so I thought I’d put the conversation I had earlier on in the day with X to the test and look for him on FB as his whatsapp gave me his full name and after about two seconds of searching Cunty Cuntyness…no…Cunty Cupcake…no…Cunty Cunterson…bam I found him! 

Straight away I saw that he had a newborn son…didn’t mention him once, also saw that his son very much came with a mother that Cunty was very much still with….FFS I have come across some cretins in recent days but this one takes the biscuit or the rusk in his case! 

Did I feel bad about having a look? Yes. Am I glad I did it? Yes. Will I be doing it again? No. Even though I dodged a bullet with this prick I now know there’s some poor woman out there with a newborn baby and her husbands swiping on Tinder it just makes me feel shit that I can’t do anything about it to help her so my foray into stalking is over unless you count my daily wanks over David Beckhams Instagram but come on…Becks though….

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